Do Soul Mates Exist, Or Just Soul Groups?
September 10, 2012
By: Geena Healer
If people keep coming back to the question of whether soul mates exist, it’s because we’d all love to have someone that we are destined to meet. I’ve always been skeptical about this. If there’s only one person out there for me, what is the likelihood that we would actually meet? This thought puts too much pressure on chance encounters and missed nights out! And what of first loves, who leave a mark even though they may not last forever? I’ve always thought we had to have at least five or six soul mates. I want better odds. Then I heard a theory about Soul Groups which tells us that there are fairly sizeable groups of people we are supposed to meet. They come into our lives to teach us a lesson, sometimes it is romantic but it can also be about friendship, respect and boundaries. There are dozens of people in our soul group and whether or not we meet them depends on how quickly we learn our lessons. Now that is a theory I can relate to!
How do you recognise someone in your Soul Group? Think of the last time you met someone and clicked with them right away. You may have only known them for a day but it felt like ages. It has happened so many times and the only way I could explain it was to say that we were on the same wavelength. In Latin America we tend to use spiritually descriptive language, and our best friends are referred to as “Amigas del Alma” which translates as Friends of the Soul. You might also meet someone and instantly dislike them. This I find even harder to explain. I’m sure you’ve met people who push your buttons. There is something in their look, feel or voice that just rubs you the wrong way! Often they’ll be people that we can’t seem to get away from, especially if they fall into the difficult bucket. Soul Groups cross our path to teach us a lesson. It can be pleasant or painful, and when the lesson is tough the best thing we can do is learn it quickly and move on.
The Soul Group theory includes romantic relationships but also family, friends, colleagues and even casual acquaintances. I had what I like to call “trial by fire” with one of the difficult lessons on my first job. At the time I’d just joined a very competitive organisation as marketing trainee. One of the people that I had to work with was a Sales Manager who liked to throw tantrums to get her own way. She had a habit of yelling and bullying anyone who was lower on the corporate ladder. It worked for her. My boss complained once or twice, but left me to get on with it. After a few months I had had enough. I remember thinking that I’d rather get fired than take her verbal abuse, and I started ignoring her requests. One day she cornered me at reception and we had a fight just as people were leaving for lunch. I told her I would not respond to any of her requests if she screamed at me. She replied saying that it was my job and I couldn’t ignore it just because I didn’t like her tone of voice. My only reply was that “I’d rather get fired than take your phone calls.”
I stalked off.
With that I prepared myself for a very uncomfortable month. The company attended a national sales conference and my brand was under-represented because I didn’t hand over the designs. My boss was annoyed but he forgot about it a few days later. The conference was low on his radar. The funny thing is this Sales Manager finally got the point. Her attitude towards me shifted so dramatically that my boss asked about it a few months later. I told him about our screaming fest, my “ultimatum” and the real reason we didn’t have branding at the conference. He thought it was a ballsy move. Apparently sticking to your guns is a big deal, especially in aggressive environments. I’ve been less inclined to tolerate rude behaviour since then. I’ve also moved on to a friendly work environment so fighting is no longer a problem for me. This brings me to the next part of the theory: when you learn your lesson the problem (or the person) disappears! How amazing is that? I’ve also heard a theory that learning the lesson keeps us from meeting similarly difficult people in the future. Wow.
I like looking at the ups and downs in relationships from this point of view. Think about who you might be struggling with now and what can you learn from the situation. The sooner you learn the lesson, the sooner it disappears. More often than not a slight change to your own behaviour will force the other person to react in a different way – thus solving the problem. The difficult thing is to distance yourself from the emotions and look at it from a rational point of view. In these cases I think it’s best to approach a close friend and ask for their honest advice. We tend to spot the mistakes others make easier than we spot our own. If you try this make sure you ask someone who has your best interests at heart and will give you honest and constructive feedback. Being willing to listen is also half of the battle, so do your best, take notes and reflect on it without challenging them or explaining your actions. It takes courage to see the truth.
About the Author: Geena is an intuitive blogger and tarot reader focusing on love, relationships and career advice. She believes that “the best way to predict the future is to create it” (Abe Lincoln quote) and approaches psychic readings by asking what her clients can do to improve their situation. Visit www.diaryofapsychichealer.com for details.